If you’re reading this, you’ve probably:

• Felt like you were losing your mind in this relationship
• Been told you’re “too sensitive” when you react to their cruelty
• Watched them charm everyone else while abusing you behind closed doors
• Apologized for things you didn’t do just to end the argument
• Felt like you’re walking on eggshells constantly
• Questioned your own reality because they deny things you KNOW happened
• Been lovebombed, devalued, and discarded (maybe multiple times)
• Noticed they never take accountability for anything
• Felt more alone with them than you ever felt single
• Wondered if YOU’RE the narcissist (you’re not—they’ve convinced you of that)

Here’s what nobody tells you:

You’re not in a relationship. You’re in a carefully constructed psychological prison designed to extract your energy, destroy your self-worth, and maintain their control.

Narcissists don’t love you. They can’t. They don’t have the capacity.

What they love is the supply you provide: attention, validation, control, admiration, someone to abuse when they’re bored.

And the sooner you accept this, the sooner you can escape.

Let me show you exactly what you’re dealing with—and how to get out before there’s nothing left of you.

What Is a Narcissist? (The Real Definition)

A narcissist is someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) or strong narcissistic traits characterized by:

• Grandiose sense of self-importance
• Lack of empathy for others
• Excessive need for admiration and validation
• Sense of entitlement
• Exploitative behavior in relationships
• Envious of others or believes others are envious of them
• Arrogant, haughty behaviors and attitudes

But here’s what that actually looks like in your relationship:

Narcissists:

• Make everything about them (even your pain)
• Cannot handle criticism (any feedback = you’re attacking them)
• Gaslight you into questioning your reality
• Lack genuine empathy (they mimic it when it serves them)
• View people as objects to use
• Cannot take accountability (everything is your fault)
• Need constant validation (you’re their supply)
• Have a false self they show the world (the real them is hidden)
• Cycle between idealization and devaluation
• Never genuinely apologize (only to manipulate you back)

What narcissism is NOT:

• Just being selfish or self-centered
• Having confidence or high self-esteem
• Being vain about appearance
• Caring about yourself
• Setting boundaries

The difference:

Healthy self-confidence: “I’m good at this. I also have areas to improve.”

Narcissism: “I’m the best at everything. Anyone who disagrees is jealous/stupid/inferior.”

Here’s the critical part:

Narcissists don’t see you as a person. They see you as an extension of themselves—an object that exists to serve their needs.

And when you stop serving those needs, they’ll discard you like garbage.

Narcissist vs. Asshole: Know the Difference

Not every toxic person is a narcissist. Here’s how to tell:

If you’re in the right column, you’re dealing with a narcissist.

And you need to understand: they will never change. Ever.

📥 Free Training: The 3-Step ‘No B.S.’ Framework to Break Free from Toxic Relationships and Heal

The 30 Signs You’re Dealing With a Narcissist

1. They Lovebombed You at the Beginning

What it looked like:

• Moved FAST (“I’ve never felt like this before”)
• Called/texted constantly
• Grand romantic gestures
• Told you you’re their soulmate within weeks
• Mirrored everything you liked
• Made you feel like you’d found “the one”
• Seemed too good to be true

What it was: A calculated trap. They studied you, became your perfect person, and hooked you before showing their true self.

Why they do it: To create an intense bond quickly so you’re emotionally invested before the abuse starts.

The shift: Once you’re hooked, the devaluation begins. And you’ll spend years trying to get back to the lovebomb phase (which was never real).

2. They’re Two Completely Different People (Public vs. Private)

In public/with others: Charming, funny, generous, helpful, amazing partner/friend/person

In private with you: Critical, cold, cruel, dismissive, abusive

What this does: When you try to tell people what they’re really like, no one believes you. “But they’re so nice! You must be exaggerating.”

The isolation: You feel crazy. Everyone else sees someone wonderful. Only you see the monster.

The truth: The public persona is the mask. The private persona is who they really are.

3. Everything Is Always Your Fault

How this plays out:

They cheated → Your fault (you weren’t affectionate enough) They lied → Your fault (you made them feel like they couldn’t be honest) They yelled → Your fault (you provoked them) They’re unhappy → Your fault (you’re not supportive enough) They forgot something → Your fault (you didn’t remind them) Literally anything goes wrong → Your fault

What they’re doing: Avoiding all accountability by making you responsible for their behavior.

What you do: Spend all your energy managing their emotions and trying to be “better” so they’ll stop abusing you.

The reality: It will never be enough. There’s always something else you’re doing wrong.

4. They Gaslight You Relentlessly

What gaslighting looks like with narcissists:

You: “You said we’d talk about moving in together.” Them: “I never said that. You’re making things up. You need help.”

You: “You screamed at me last night.” Them: “I didn’t scream. You’re too sensitive. You twist everything.”

What they do:

• Deny things they said/did
• Tell you you’re remembering wrong
• Accuse you of being crazy
• Rewrite history constantly
• Make you doubt your own sanity

Why it works: After enough gaslighting, you stop trusting yourself and rely on them to tell you what’s real.

Learn more: Gaslighting: When They Make You Question Reality

5. They Have Zero Empathy

What this looks like:

You’re sick → They’re annoyed you can’t take care of them You’re grieving → They make it about themselves You’re hurt by their actions → They’re the victim You need emotional support → You’re being needy

The test: Tell them about something painful. Watch how fast they:

• Change the subject to themselves
• Minimize your pain
• Get annoyed you’re upset
• Make themselves the victim

The truth: They don’t care about your pain unless it affects them.

6. They Need Constant Validation and Admiration

What they require:

• Compliments constantly
• Praise for basic tasks
• Admiration for their achievements (real or exaggerated)
• Agreement with everything they say
• Validation that they’re special/unique/superior

What happens if you don’t provide it:

• Narcissistic rage
• Silent treatment
• Seeking validation elsewhere (affair/new supply)
• Punishing you for your “lack of support”

What you become: A validation machine. Your entire role is to prop up their fragile ego.

7. They Cannot Handle ANY Criticism

What happens when you give feedback:

You: “It hurt my feelings when you—” Them: “I CAN’T DO ANYTHING RIGHT! You’re always attacking me! I’m such a terrible person, right?!”

What they do:

• Turn themselves into the victim
• Rage at you for daring to criticize them
• Give you the silent treatment
• Punish you for days/weeks
• Make you comfort THEM for hurting YOUR feelings

What you learn: Stop sharing when they hurt you. It’s easier to suppress your feelings than deal with their reaction.

8. They’re Jealous and Competitive (Even With You)

What this looks like:

• Can’t celebrate your achievements
• Downplay your successes
• Compete with you instead of supporting you
• Jealous of your friends, hobbies, career
• Make your good news about themselves
• Sabotage opportunities you have

Example: You: “I got a promotion!” Them: “That’s nice. Did I tell you about MY project? It’s way more important than what you’re doing.”

The underlying belief: Your success threatens their superiority. Therefore, you must be kept small.

9. They Use the Silent Treatment as Punishment

How it works: You “upset” them (by having a boundary, expressing a need, or existing wrong) → They give you the silent treatment for days/weeks → You panic and beg for communication → They finally “allow” you back but you have to grovel first.

What it’s doing: Training you that expressing needs = losing them. So you stop having needs.

The cruelty: It’s emotional abuse. They’re purposely making you suffer to maintain control.

10. They Lovebomb After Abuse (The Cycle)

The narcissistic abuse cycle:

Phase 1: Idealization/Lovebomb (You’re perfect! I love you! You’re my soulmate!)

Phase 2: Devaluation (You’re terrible. Nothing you do is right. You’re lucky I’m with you.)

Phase 3: Discard (Silent treatment, cheating, threatening to leave, or actually leaving)

Phase 4: Hoover (I miss you! I’ve changed! No one understands me like you! Please come back!)

Then back to Phase 1. Repeat infinitely.

Why you stay: You’re addicted to Phase 1. You keep trying to get back to how it was at the beginning.

The truth: Phase 1 was never real. Phase 2 is who they are. Phase 4 is manipulation.

This is trauma bonding.

11. They Triangulate (Use Other People Against You)

What triangulation looks like:

• “My ex never complained about this.” (making you compete with their ex)
• “Everyone thinks you’re overreacting.” (using imaginary others to make you feel crazy)
• Flirting with others in front of you (making you jealous/insecure)
• Comparing you unfavorably to others
• Having “friends” they’re weirdly close with (possible affair partners)

The goal: Keep you insecure, jealous, and competing for their attention.

The damage: You’re always anxious, always trying to prove you’re worth choosing.

12. They’re Pathological Liars

What they lie about:

• Where they were
• Who they were with
• What they did
• What they said
• Their past
• Their feelings
• Money
• Everything

The skill: They’re CONVINCING. They lie with complete confidence. They believe their own lies.

What you do: Question your own reality. “Maybe I did misunderstand…” (You didn’t. They’re lying.)

13. They Play the Victim Constantly

The pattern: No matter what happens, THEY’RE the victim.

They cheated → “You drove me to it by not being affectionate enough” They lied → “You made me feel like I couldn’t tell you the truth” They’re abusive → “You’re abusing ME by calling me abusive”

What this does: Prevents them from ever being held accountable. You end up comforting them for things THEY did to YOU.

14. They Have a String of Failed Relationships (And It’s Always the Ex’s Fault)

What they tell you: “All my exes were crazy.” “My ex was abusive.” “My ex cheated on me.” “Everyone I’ve dated has been toxic.”

The common denominator: Them. THEY’RE the problem. Not all their exes.

What you think: “But it’s different with me. I’m not like their exes.”

The reality: You’re currently becoming the “crazy ex” they’ll tell the next supply about.

15. They Use Your Vulnerabilities Against You

What happens: You share something painful/private → They use it to hurt you during arguments

Examples:

• You shared about your sexual assault → They call you “damaged goods” when they’re angry
• You shared about your body insecurity → They mock your appearance
• You shared about your mental health → They call you “crazy”

What this is: Weaponizing your intimacy. Taking what you trusted them with and using it as ammunition.

The betrayal: You can never be vulnerable with them safely again.

16. They Isolate You

How they do it:

• Criticize your friends/family (“They don’t really care about you like I do”)
• Create drama when you have plans with others
• Make you choose between them and your support system
• Move you away from your network
• Make you feel guilty for spending time with anyone else

Why: Isolated victims are easier to control. Your support system might validate your reality and encourage you to leave.

The result: You’re completely dependent on them for social/emotional connection.

17. They Never Genuinely Apologize

Narcissist apologies:

• “I’m sorry you feel that way” (not an apology)
• “I’m sorry, BUT…” (blames you)
• “I’m sorry! I’m such a terrible person! You should leave me!” (manipulation)
• “Fine, I’m sorry!” (resentful, not genuine)

What’s missing:

• Accountability (“I was wrong”)
• Understanding (“I hurt you by doing X”)
• Changed behavior (actually stopping the harmful action)

The pattern: “Apologize” → Continue same behavior → “Apologize” → Repeat

18. They’re Grandiose (Special, Superior, Unique)

What this sounds like:

• “I’m smarter than everyone at my job”
• “People are intimidated by how successful I am”
• “I could be famous if I wanted to”
• “Most people can’t understand me”
• “I’m too advanced for normal relationships”

The belief: They genuinely think they’re superior to others.

What you do: Feed this delusion by agreeing. Because disagreeing = narcissistic rage.

19. They Have Rage Episodes (Disproportionate Anger)

What triggers it:

• Criticism (any amount)
• Not getting their way
• Being told “no”
• You having boundaries
• Perceived slight or disrespect
• Someone else getting attention

What it looks like: Screaming, breaking things, threatening you, name-calling, intimidation, sometimes violence.

The intensity: Way beyond what the “trigger” warranted. You spilled something? They’re screaming like you burned down their house.

What you do: Walk on eggshells constantly trying not to trigger their rage.

20. They’re Future Faking Constantly

What they promise: Marriage, kids, moving in, trips, building a life together, changing their behavior, going to therapy, etc.

What they deliver: Nothing. It’s all talk designed to keep you invested.

The timeline: Always vague. “Soon.” “Eventually.” “When things settle down.”

The purpose: Keep you hopeful about a future that will never exist.

21. They’re Controlling

What they control:

• What you wear
• Who you see
• Where you go
• What you post on social media
• Your finances
• Your access to information
• Your career decisions

How they justify it: “I’m just trying to protect you” / “I’m just being helpful” / “You make bad decisions”

What it is: Control. Domination. Removing your autonomy.

22. They Devalue You (You’ll Never Be Good Enough)

After the lovebomb ends: Everything you do is wrong. Everything about you needs to change.

What they criticize: Your appearance, intelligence, personality, friends, family, job, hobbies, existence.

The goal: Destroy your self-worth so you believe you’re lucky they’re with you and won’t leave.

What it does: Keeps you trying to earn their approval (which you’ll never get).

23. They Cheat (and Blame You)

The affair: They cheat. Often repeatedly. Sometimes with multiple people.

The discovery: You find out or they confess.

Their response: “You drove me to it because you weren’t [attentive/sexual/supportive] enough.”

What this is: Making their betrayal your fault.

The pattern: They’ll cheat again. And again. And it will always be your fault.

24. They Have Flying Monkeys

What flying monkeys are: People the narcissist uses to harass, monitor, or manipulate you.

Who they are:

• Their friends who believe their lies about you
• Your mutual friends they’ve convinced you’re the problem
• Their family who enables them
• New supply who doesn’t know they’re being used

What they do: Report your activities back to the narcissist, harass you, try to convince you to go back, send messages on the narcissist’s behalf.

25. They Discard You Brutally (Then Try to Hoover You Back)

The discard: When you’re no longer useful or they found new supply, they discard you cruelly:

• Ghosting after years together
• Cruel breakup where they list all your flaws
• Cheating then leaving for the affair partner
• Making you beg them to stay then leaving anyway

The hoover (weeks/months later): “I miss you” / “I’ve changed” / “No one understands me like you” / “I made a mistake”

What they want: Supply. Not you. Just your attention/validation/control.

What you do: Either fall for it or finally block them.

26. They Lack Object Permanence for Your Feelings

What this means: When you’re not in front of them, your feelings don’t exist to them.

Example: You’re devastated about something they did → They go out and have fun like nothing happened → You bring it up → “Why are you still upset about that? That was hours ago. Get over it.”

The expectation: Your feelings should evaporate the moment THEY’RE done thinking about it.

27. They’re Great at First Impressions (But Can’t Maintain)

The pattern:

• Amazing first date → Second date is weird
• Great first week → Second week they’re different
• Perfect first month → Things start to crack
• Excellent job interview → Terrible employee
• Charming first meeting → Your friends see red flags after knowing them

What’s happening: They can perform “normal” short-term. But maintaining the mask long-term is exhausting. The real them always emerges.

28. Everything Is Transactional

How they view relationships: “I did X for you, so you owe me Y.”

Examples:

• “I bought you dinner, so you owe me sex.”
• “I helped you move, so you have to help me whenever I want.”
• “I’m nice to you, so you can’t criticize me.”

What’s missing: Genuine generosity. They do things to create debt, not out of love.

29. They Cannot Be Happy for You

Your achievements make them:

• Jealous
• Competitive
• Dismissive
• Need to one-up you
• Sabotage your success

Your failures make them:

• Secretly happy
• Outwardly “supportive” but with hidden satisfaction
• Able to feel superior

The dream partner: Celebrates your wins and supports you through losses. Narcissists do neither.

30. You Feel Like You’re Going Insane

The signs:

• You don’t recognize yourself anymore
• You question your own memory constantly
• You feel anxious all the time
• You’re depressed
• You’re isolated
• You’ve lost your identity
• You’re obsessed with understanding them
• You think maybe YOU’RE the narcissist

The truth: If you’re questioning whether you’re the narcissist, you’re not. Narcissists don’t have that level of self-awareness.

What’s happening: Narcissistic abuse is psychological torture. You’re not going crazy. You’re being driven crazy.

Why Narcissists Target You (The Truth About Supply)

You’re Not Random

Narcissists don’t target everyone. They target specific people:

Who they target:

• Empathetic people (you’ll excuse their bad behavior)
• Anxiously attached people (you’ll cling harder when they pull away)
• People with low self-worth (easier to manipulate)
• People pleasers (you’ll contort yourself to make them happy)
• Successful/attractive/talented people (your shine makes them look good)
• People with resources (money, connections, status they can exploit)
• People recovering from past trauma (you’re already vulnerable)

What they’re looking for:

Primary supply: Admiration, validation, attention (that’s you)

Secondary supply: Enablers, flying monkeys, people who believe their lies

What you provide:

• Emotional supply (attention, validation, ego feeding)
• Practical supply (money, housing, connections, status)
• Punching bag (someone to devalue when they feel bad)

The realization: You’re not special to them. You’re useful. The moment you stop being useful, you’re discarded.

Why You Can’t Fix Them (Stop Trying)

The Fantasy vs. The Reality

What you believe: “If I love them enough, they’ll change.” “If I’m patient, they’ll get better.” “If I prove my worth, they’ll treat me better.” “Deep down, they’re good. I saw it during the lovebomb.”

The reality:

Narcissistic Personality Disorder is a personality disorder. It’s not:

• A phase
• Caused by their ex/childhood/job
• Fixable with your love
• Something they’ll outgrow
• Treatable with regular therapy

The truth about narcissists and therapy:

• Most don’t think they need it (you’re the problem, not them)
• If they go, it’s to manipulate you into staying
• They learn therapy language to gaslight you better
• They charm the therapist and paint you as the problem
• They don’t change. They just get better at hiding it.

The statistics:

• Very few narcissists ever get treatment
• Of those who do, even fewer stick with it
• Of those who stick with it, almost none significantly change
• The change requires years of intensive therapy AND genuine desire to change
• Narcissists rarely have genuine desire to change (they don’t think they’re the problem)

Stop waiting for them to:

• See your worth
• Appreciate you
• Develop empathy
• Stop lying
• Stop cheating
• Treat you well consistently
• Become the person they were during lovebombing

That person never existed. It was a mask they wore to trap you.

How to Protect Yourself From a Narcissist

If You’re Still With Them:

Step 1: Accept What They Are

Stop making excuses. Stop hoping they’ll change. Accept: You’re with a narcissist who will never truly love you.

Step 2: Document Everything

• Screenshot texts
• Record conversations (if legal)
• Keep a journal with dates/times/incidents
• Save emails
• Document financial transactions

Why: You’ll need this when you leave (and they smear your name/gaslight you about what happened).

Step 3: Build a Support Network Secretly

Reconnect with friends/family they’ve isolated you from. Don’t tell the narcissist. You’ll need these people when you leave.

Step 4: Secure Your Finances

• Separate bank accounts (they don’t know about)
• Save money they can’t access
• Get copies of important documents
• Check your credit report
• Change passwords to accounts

Step 5: Create an Exit Plan

• Where will you go?
• Who will help you?
• What will you take?
• How will you support yourself?
• How will you stay safe?

Important: Don’t tell them you’re planning to leave. The most dangerous time is when you’re leaving or just after.

Step 6: Grey Rock (Minimal Engagement)

What this is: Becoming as boring and unresponsive as a grey rock.

How:

• Minimal communication
• No emotional reactions
• Short, factual responses only
• Don’t share anything personal
• Don’t engage in arguments

Why: Narcissists feed on your emotional reactions. Starve them.

Step 7: Leave

When you’re ready, leave. Ideally when they’re not there.

How:

• Pack essentials
• Leave with help (friends/family)
• Go somewhere they don’t know about
• Implement no contact immediately
• Block everywhere

After You Leave:

Step 8: Absolute No Contact

Block:

• Phone number
• Email
• Social media (all platforms)
• Flying monkeys
• Anyone who might report back to them

No exceptions:

• Don’t respond to hoovers
• Don’t “check” how they’re doing
• Don’t look at their social media
• Don’t respond to “emergencies” (they’re manipulation)

Why it’s critical: Every contact resets your healing. They WILL try to hoover you back. Don’t fall for it.

Step 9: Get Therapy (Trauma-Specialized)

What you need: A therapist who specializes in:

• Narcissistic abuse
• PTSD/C-PTSD
• Trauma bonding
• Rebuilding self-worth

What to avoid:

• Couples counseling with the narcissist (they’ll manipulate the therapist)
• Therapists who don’t understand narcissistic abuse
• Therapists who suggest reconciliation

Step 10: Expect the Smear Campaign

What they’ll do:

• Tell everyone you’re crazy/abusive/unstable
• Lie about what happened
• Play the victim
• Turn mutual friends against you
• Use flying monkeys to harass you

What you do: Don’t defend yourself to people who believe them. Real friends will see through it.

Step 11: Prepare for the Hoover

When they’ll hoover:

• When you’re finally happy
• When you start dating someone new
• On holidays/your birthday
• When they need something
• When they’re bored
• When new supply doesn’t work out

What it looks like: “I miss you” / “I’ve changed” / “I’m in therapy” / “No one understands me like you” / “I made the biggest mistake”

What you do: Don’t respond. Block new numbers/accounts immediately.

What Healing From Narcissistic Abuse Looks Like

Month 1-3: The Withdrawal

What you’ll feel:

• Physical withdrawal symptoms (they’re as real as drug withdrawal)
• Obsessive thoughts about them
• Wanting to check on them
• Temptation to break no contact
• Grief over the person you thought they were

What’s happening: You’re trauma bonded. Your brain is addicted to the intermittent reinforcement.

What helps:

• Strict no contact
• Support group
• Therapy
• Journal
• Exercise
• Stay busy

Month 4-6: The Anger

What you’ll feel:

• Rage at them for what they did
• Anger at yourself for staying
• Fury at how much time you wasted
• Resentment that they’re probably fine

What’s happening: Your brain is processing the abuse. This anger is healthy.

What helps: Channel it into healing. This energy can fuel your recovery.

Month 7-12: The Clarity

What you’ll see:

• How obvious the red flags were
• How much you lost (yourself, time, energy, opportunities)
• The patterns you ignored
• Why you stayed (usually childhood wounds + attachment issues)

What’s happening: The fog is lifting. You’re seeing reality clearly.

What helps:

• Therapy to address why you were vulnerable to narcissists
• Work on self-worth
• Learn about attachment styles
• Understand boundaries

Year 2+: The Rebuilding

What you’ll do:

• Rebuild your identity
• Reconnect with yourself
• Set healthy boundaries
• Learn red flags
• Date again (carefully)
• Trust yourself again

What you’ll notice:

• You recognize narcissistic behavior immediately now
• You walk away at first red flag
• You trust your gut
• You have standards
• You won’t tolerate disrespect

The transformation: You become someone who would never tolerate what you once accepted.

Frequently Asked Questions

Can narcissists change?

Technically possible but extremely rare. It requires: (1) Acknowledging they have a problem (most never do), (2) Years of intensive therapy with a specialist, (3) Genuine desire to change (they rarely have this). Don’t wait around to see if they’re the exception. They’re not.

How do I know if I’m the narcissist?

If you’re asking this question, you’re not. Narcissists don’t have this level of self-awareness or concern about hurting others. If you’re worried you might be the problem, you’re probably being gaslit.

What if we have kids together?

Parallel parenting with strict boundaries. Communicate only about kids through text/email (documented). Use a parenting app if possible. Grey rock all interactions. Protect your children from manipulation. Consider therapy for them.

Why do I still love them?

You don’t love who they are. You love who they pretended to be during lovebombing. You’re trauma bonded to the abuse cycle. With time and no contact, these feelings fade.

Will they treat the new supply better?

No. The new supply is getting the same lovebomb→devalue→discard cycle you got. The narcissist doesn’t change people, they change victims. You’re watching the lovebomb phase you experienced. The abuse will come.

How do I stop checking their social media?

Block them everywhere. Ask a friend to change your passwords temporarily. When tempted, remember: what you see is a carefully curated lie designed to make you jealous and maintain supply.

What if they really have changed this time?

They haven’t. This is a hoover tactic. Even IF they went to therapy (rare), personality disorders take 5-10 years of intensive treatment to see real change. Your job isn’t to wait around to find out.

How do I date again without attracting another narcissist?

Work on yourself first. Heal your attachment wounds. Build self-worth. Learn red flags. Trust your gut. Leave at the first sign of lovebombing, future faking, boundary violations, or disrespect.

The Bottom Line: You Deserve Better Than This

You are not in a relationship. You’re in an abusive dynamic with someone incapable of love.

Narcissists don’t:

• Love you (they can’t—they lack empathy)
• See you as a person (you’re an object/supply source)
• Plan to change (they think they’re perfect)
• Feel bad about hurting you (your pain makes them feel powerful)

Narcissists do:

• Systematically destroy your self-worth
• Gaslight you into questioning reality
• Isolate you from support
• Cycle between lovebombing and devaluation
• Use you until you’re empty
• Discard you when you’re no longer useful

You deserve:

• Someone who doesn’t require you to lose yourself
• Someone who’s the same person in public and private
• Someone who takes accountability
• Someone who has empathy
• Someone who makes you feel MORE like yourself, not less

Stop:

• Making excuses for them
• Hoping they’ll change
• Sacrificing yourself for crumbs
• Believing their lies
• Accepting this treatment

Start:

• Planning your exit
• Rebuilding your support network
• Documenting everything
• Protecting yourself
• Believing your own reality

Leave.

Block.

Heal.

Never accept this again.

Your White Horse doesn’t abuse you, gaslight you, or devalue you.

Your White Horse makes you feel safe, seen, and valued.

This person is not that.

And staying won’t change them.

It will only destroy more of you.

Your Next Step: Reclaim Your Life

If you’re with a narcissist:

My book Win Your Breakup: How To Be The One That Got Away will give you the clarity and strategy to leave and never look back.

If you need help leaving:

One-on-one coaching provides personalized support for creating exit plans, processing narcissistic abuse, and rebuilding your life.

If you want community:

Join the Natasha Adamo Community for courses on recognizing narcissistic abuse, healing trauma bonds, and preventing future narcissistic relationships.

Stop trying to fix them.

Start saving yourself.

You can’t love someone into having empathy.

You can’t prove your worth to someone who sees you as an object.

Leave before there’s nothing left of you.

Written by: Natasha Adamo

If you need further and more specific help; if you’re ready to escape narcissistic abuse and reclaim your reality, personalized coaching with Natasha Adamo is the answer. Book your one-on-one session today.

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• Future Faking: When They Promise Everything But Deliver Nothing
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• Anxious Attachment: Why You’re Attracted to Unavailable People

About Natasha Adamo

Natasha Adamo is a globally recognized self-help author, relationship expert, and motivational speaker. With over 2.5 million devoted blog readers and clients in thirty-one countries, she is a beacon of inspiration to many. Her debut bestseller, “Win Your Breakup”, offers a unique perspective on personal growth after breakups. Natasha’s mission is to empower individuals to develop healthier relationships and actualize their inherent potential.